


Food

by wyvernlordminerva



Series: Caminoka Week 2k16 [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: ARFID, Eating Disorders, F/F, Unhealthy Coping, Unhealthy Habits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-08-16 23:28:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8121745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wyvernlordminerva/pseuds/wyvernlordminerva
Summary: If Camilla had the choice, she would never eat anything again.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this was supposed to be a cute prompt, i'm certain. I projected anyway

Camilla was always careful to not be noticed. It was easier that way, safer, to just silently listen to her mother chatter with the other court ladies with her hands in her lap and tongue still. If she didn’t make a fuss, no one would notice her carefully throw away her dinner piece by piece, and the meal would pass her by without a fuss.

It wasn’t that she wanted to starve herself, or even that it tasted bad. She just couldn’t tolerate the thought of eating anything, with a few exceptions. Namely, almost tasteless foods with unoffensive textures. The blander the better, as far she was concerned. Anything else might actually make her sicker than the malnutrition.

She didn’t know how long she had hated food, but she knew without a doubt that, if she had the choice, she would never eat anything again.

Unfortunately for her, people need energy. This in particular was a problem on the road; she could never tolerate the rations they took with them, aside from the occasional piece of bread. She was certain she had lost some weight this week.

But it wasn’t too bad, really. If anything, she was happy for the excuse to ignore her aching stomach, even as her mind screamed at her about her health. Soon, they’d be at Castle Shirasagi, and Hinoka would be there, and everything would be alright. She was just fine.

Elise actually leaped out of the carriage as they arrived, running straight to Sakura and enveloping her in a crushing hug. Xander apologized for her lack of manners, but Ryouma waved it off, just happy to see everyone getting along. And then there was Hinoka, awkwardly standing off to the side. She had always been awful with formal interaction, and she had no idea how to approach Camilla after being away from her for months.

Camilla went ahead and took the initiative.

“Hinoka, darling, how have you been?” she said, smiling.

“Ah, fine!” Hinoka said, “I really missed you.” Camilla ‘aww’d and engulfed her in one of her infamous hugs. Hinoka never complained.

Her stomach growled.

“Oh, are you guys hungry?” Sakura asked.

“I’m starving!” Elise moaned, “When’s dinner?”

“Very soon,” Hinoka said, “We have all kinds of Hoshidan dishes for you to try!”

“Ah, I’m afraid I’ll have to miss out on that,” Camilla said, carefully watching her siblings for any sign of suspicion, “I’m exhausted from our trip and I’d rather just go straight to bed. I hope that’s not presumptuous of me.” Well, it wasn’t entirely a lie. She did feel kind of unsteady on her feet.

“No, of course not!” Hinoka assured her. “Don’t even worry about it. I’ll just bring you to your room.”

In hindsight, she was really pushing her limits at that point. She should’ve at least looked to see if there was something she could eat, or at least, stayed in bed the next morning instead of touring the market under the burning Hoshidan sun with Hinoka.

“Camilla! Are you feeling better?” she asked, expression brightening as Camilla approached.

“Yes, much better,” she said, “Let’s not waste any time. You said the markets get quite busy at noon.”

“Yeah, of course. Let’s go!”

Hoshido truly was beautiful, that she could appreciate. Nohr had it’s own charm, but you wouldn’t have to worry about violent muggings and being left for dead every time you went outside, for instance. She felt no qualms whipping out her ample wallet and purchasing anything Hinoka looked twice at, despite her embarrassed protests.

“Y-you really don’t need to!” she said, her face turning that wonderful shade of pink/

“But I want to,” Camilla replied. She would spoil this girl rotten. 

But her actions always caught up with her eventually, and it wasn’t even an hour into their trip she began stumbling.

“...Camilla? Are you feeling okay?” Hinoka asked, suddenly noticing her lack of energy. Camilla took a shuddering breath and wiped the sweat from her face.

“I’m fine,” she said, “It’s much hotter here than in Nohr.” Hinoka gave her a wary look. She bought it for the moment, but then Camilla collapsed. Hinoka shouted something, lifting her off the ground and bringing her away from the crowd.

“It’s just a dizzy spell...” she said, vision slowly clearing.

“That’s not even what I asked,” Hinoka said, frown etched deep into her face. She moved her into an alley and gave her a moment to regain herself. “I didn’t see you at breakfast this morning. I assumed you ate in your room or something, but...”

Camilla couldn’t bear to look her in the eyes.

“When was the last time you ate at all?”

“I don’t know, two days ago?” she mumbled \\. Hinoka swore under her breath.

“Wait here, I’ll get you something.” Before she could tell her not to bother, Hinoka disappeared back into the crowd. She focused in on her breathing and tried to keep it together. Xander would lose it if he found out she was hurting herself like this.

Not long later, Hinoka was back.

“Here, eat this. It’s light.” She held out a bowl of rice for her to take. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. It seemed okay, but the spice, and the smell… “Is something wrong?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t eat this,” Camilla said.

“What? Why not?” Hinoka scrutinized the food in her hands, frantically searching for some kind of explanation. Camilla chuckled bitterly.

“Just… take me back. I’ll figure something out,” she said, “I need to get out of here.”

Carefully, they navigated through the crowds and made it to the castle. Hinoka guided her to the nearest room and laid her down.

“Camilla...” she muttered, “you really need to eat something now.”

“I know, I know, but...”

“I can get you anything. Just tell me what you can eat.” Camilla almost couldn’t believe she was still trying to help her, but then she remembered. This was Hinoka. Of course she would stick with her until the end.

“I...” She thought for a moment. “I can eat bread. Plain. And soup, if it’s just broth and isn’t too strong.” Hinoka wracked her brain for a moment, then left. When she returned, she had managed to find her some bread rolls, but also carried some things Camilla had never seen before.

“I found some!” she announced. “ You can eat some of this, right?” Camilla nodded.

“Yes, but what is…?”

“Uh, well, it’s kind of hard to get Nohrian food, so I figured I’d bring you some Hoshidan food, too. It’s pretty similar, so maybe you can eat it?” she said. Camilla hummed quietly, examining everything.

She grabbed the roll and ate it, but avoided everything else.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I just figured you might want more options...” Hinoka said. Camilla smiled.

“Thank you,” she said, “...I might try some of these later, but I’m just not feeling up to it right now.”

“Oh, okay.” She seemed a little less nervous now. “Do you… think it’ll be alright?” Camilla looked down at the palate she had been offered. She didn’t trust any of it, and yet, somehow....

“Yes, I think everything will be just fine.”


End file.
